Add raisins, stir thoroughly, and cover pot for 5 minutes. I would hover over her shoulder as she cooked, asking questions and scribbling notes. Vegetables must be chopped, lentils soaked, spices roasted and ground before slowly simmering everything together. Transfer the grated carrots to a large pot and add water. Growing up in South Dakota and Wyoming, independence and self-sufficiency had been prized. At times it seemed like my mother-in-law and I might never understand each other — but we kept cooking together. In a food processor, grate the carrots. It took me years to master the basics. Occasionally I struggled to muzzle my feminist inclinations in order to keep the peace.
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